Picture this: You're a man with a Master's degree who built a successful coaching business, yet you're sitting in a roach-infested halfway house watching insects fall from the ceiling onto your bed. You've done everything society told you to do to be successful, so how did you end up here? Sometimes life's most humiliating moments become our most powerful catalysts for transformation.

From Success to Starting Over: When Life Hit My Reset Button

My story reads like a masterclass in resilience wrapped in raw human experience—though I certainly didn't see it that way when I was living it. Born and raised in the South Bronx to a teenage single mother after my father was killed in Vietnam, I defied every statistic. I earned admission to Phillips Academy Andover at 14—one of America's most prestigious prep schools. I became a Fulbright Scholar, earned advanced degrees from Morgan State University and City College of New York, and built a successful coaching business.

Then divorce hit like a financial tsunami.

Upon telling the magistrate that I couldn't survive on half of my take-home pay, she responded, "That's not our problem." I'll never forget those words. Within months, I lost my home and found myself moving from place to place, sometimes as much as daily, with everything I owned packed in my car. The path from success to surviving day-to-day was swift and merciless.

But here's where my story diverges from tragedy to triumph.

The Wisdom Born from Crisis

Research from the American Psychological Association shows that men over 40 face unique challenges during major life transitions, with divorce ranking as the second most stressful life event after the death of a spouse. What separates those who rise from those who remain stuck isn't the absence of struggle—it's the willingness to transform pain into power.

During my darkest period in a veteran's homeless shelter plagued by bed bugs and deplorable conditions, I experienced what I now call my "most prolific poem writing period." Working full-time yet still homeless due to crushing child support payments, I discovered something profound: my pain had purpose.

I was processing my experiences, pushing through my circumstances, and refusing to let my environment define my future. This wasn't just survival—it was preparation for something greater, though I couldn't see it then.

The Birth of A Movement

From those experiences emerged "The Rebound"—a platform I created specifically for divorced men over 40 seeking to rediscover their power and rebuild deeper connections with their children. What started as my personal survival evolved into a systematic approach I call "The 5 Steps to Power":

Self-Awareness: Understanding who you are beneath the titles divorce stripped away Trust: Rebuilding confidence in your decision-making abilities
Mindset Shift: Transforming obstacles into opportunities Organization: Creating systems that support your rise Leveraging Connections: Building networks that elevate rather than drain

The Global Foundation: Building My Perspective

My journey as a Malik Shabazz Human Rights Institute Scholar, where I studied at the United Nations headquarters in Geneva, provided crucial perspective that I didn't fully appreciate until my world collapsed. That experience gave me an invaluable world perspective on our day-to-day issues through the prism of politics, culture, language, race and nationality.

This global viewpoint later proved essential during my rebuild, helping me see my personal challenges within a broader context of human resilience and possibility.

My Factory Reset Principle in Action

What makes my approach unique is my hard-won understanding that men over 40 don't need to "get back" to who we were—we need to rise to who we're meant to become. My "Rise Above the Rim" philosophy treats life's obstacles not as barriers but as launching pads.

The breakthrough came from the most unexpected place: my PlayStation. One day, while seeking mental refuge from the strain of rebuilding my life, my PS4 stopped working. After hours of research and technical support calls, I discovered the solution was a hard reset of the entire system.

As I watched my PlayStation restart with a clean slate, it hit me like lightning. Whenever I have problems in life, I usually solve them by resetting my software—my way of thinking. Sometimes our mental operating system gets corrupted by too much stress, too many failures, too many disappointments. The solution isn't trying to run the same broken programs—it's doing a factory reset on our entire mindset.

I had to face uncomfortable truths about myself, including how my relationship with my mother had impacted my romantic relationships for years. When my mother died, I had to learn to see her for the woman she was: Delores Berlack, flaws and all, and not just as my mother who in my eyes as a young boy was supposed to be perfect.

Through this process, I learned to identify what I call my "non-negotiables": the things that I can't allow in my relationships, such as disrespect and unshared values. This wasn't about becoming rigid—it was about becoming intentional.

The Ripple Effect: When My Rise Elevates Others

Today, my platform reaches thousands of men worldwide through "The Rebound" newsletter and my comprehensive "Broadcast Your Inner Champion" coaching system. But perhaps more importantly, I've proven that your worst chapter can indeed become the foundation for your best one.

My story demonstrates that rising above life's rim isn't about avoiding struggle—it's about transforming struggle into strength, pain into purpose, and setbacks into comebacks. When one man rises with authenticity and vulnerability, it creates permission for others to believe in their own potential for transformation.

As I always say: "The rim isn't just an obstacle—it's your launching pad."